The Power of Four-Letter Words

Kind words are a creative force, a power that concurs in the building up of all that is good, and energy that showers blessings upon the world.
-Lawrence G. Lovasik

How closely do you pay attention to the words you choose and the connotations they hold?

You might be surprised to find that words are more powerful than you think. In fact, they shape how we see the world and how we see ourselves…

…for better or for worse.

Words are the building blocks of our self-talk, a foundation we take from our parents and caregivers as we grow up. This is also why parents who do not choose their words carefully might unintentionally harm their child’s self-esteem with a rude side comment on a stressful day.

It’s often these negative words that children cling to the most, and can have lasting impacts on their view of themselves even decades later.

My father must have known that, because one of his favorite sayings while I was growing up went like this:

“If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

I’ve repeated these same words to my kids many times, as they never had the opportunity to meet my dad. But I like to think that they are still connected to him through his teachings that I worked hard to instill in them.

I’m also finding that my father’s words have a big impact on my own parenting philosophy. I always make an effort to choose my words carefully when it comes to encouraging or disciplining my own children.

But it doesn’t stop at parenting. It’s something that I carry into other aspects of my life. I put a lot of thought and effort into the words I use with my friends, my coworkers, my team at Centerpointe, and of course, myself.

And just as I was thinking over what words I try to avoid…

…I realized that we also tend to lock certain words away that should be said more often.

You see, there are some words that we tend to unintentionally lock away in an imaginary vault and rarely use.

Which is a real shame, because these unspoken words are like a well of untapped power and potential. If we used them on a regular basis, they could change our businesses, our relationships and our overall happiness - in a good way!

So, what are these unspoken words that you might be missing out on?

Love: When was the last time you told your kids, spouse and customers (yes, I said customers) you love them? I know you feel it, so say it! Not just for them - but for you, too. According to experts, people who express their love are healthier and live longer!

Hope: By talking about hope you are actually verbalizing what you want. Verbalizing is the first step. The second step is actually doing, hence making your dreams come true.

Good: There is good in all people. And this is something we should focus on more. Tell your kids that they did a good job. Tell your clients that they are doing good work. The more you use this word, the more good will come into your life.

Feel: Ask others how they feel and make sure you ask yourself how you feel about a situation. Too often, we keep things bottled up. When we ask the question, we often find answers that remove roadblocks.

Kind: Telling others that they are kind is like a chain reaction. When you acknowledge and encourage kindness, it actually becomes the norm.

Live: If you ask a terminally ill person what they want more than anything in the world, they will most likely tell you they want to live. We need to share with everyone that they should live their life to the fullest, and not waste time.

Joke: Ask someone if they want to hear a joke and you will see an immediate smile. As a matter of fact, when I speak in public I usually ask the audience if they want to hear a joke. Just the word joke lightens the atmosphere and creates a better learning environment.

Gift: Whenever you say the word gift, something great is bound to happen. It could be an actual physical present or it could be the gift you hold within. The more we talk about these gifts, the more we share and spread happiness.

Life: This is one of the most precious words. When we ask someone about their life, we should do so with gracious intent. We should honor this word, as it is the key to our being.

To-be: Ok, so to-be is a compound word. But nevertheless, it is so incredibly strong. We should always be bringing up, not only what we want to-do and accomplish, but also what we want to-be! This helps us strive for greatness.

Of course I could make a list of obvious “bad” words. But in my view there is only one word that is so heinous to avoid at all costs.

And that word is…

Hate: Now here’s the reason this is the worst word in the world. When you actually say you hate someone or some group of people, you are actually destroying yourself with that negativity.

And this word in fact encapsulates all the other bad words.

You’ll notice a difference with your significant other and close friends and family members. The time you spend with each other will be exponentially more enjoyable.

But mostly, you’ll notice a difference within!

By using those powerful four-letter words and eliminating the worst word, you’ll find yourself more happy, more resilient, more loved and more free!

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